Castle Intrigue

I had reasons enough not to go

But I slipped out of bed anyway.

I had reason enough to be there.

Many people crowd the court today

I move in and am handed papers of introduction.

I smile in courtesy and a man approaches

“You have a beautiful smile,” he says boldly

And the keepers inside raise flags

He informs me of his fame

And my courtesy stiffens wary

“I’d like to get to know you,” he finishes

I close my mouth and nod in respect to his King

Moving away now to the safety of my sister’s company.

It can be awkward here, in the court

Our souls are remarkably transparent. 

I am here for one reason only, and it is not to be seen.

We move inside and settle in chairs. 

I purposely move far over to the side 

Opposite where I see the man

And sink gratefully into dark shelter.

Talk and talk goes on as the necessary preliminaries are covered

This kingdom is a big hold and there are many tribes and tongues.

But finally, my tribe is given the floor and I heave a sigh

This language is the one I feel in the marrow

The gift is that this tongue can wash the marrow of any tribe

And so they lift their voices in music, and the washing begins

And all of us leave our various intrigues 

And sink into the awe of the King come again. 

Loud this morning!

Shouts of anticipation and devotion

Each in private audience, bowing under the weight of love

Intoning in sobs and moans so intimate I close my eyes

Like a woman in labor, unconstrained 

Utterly real, in awe, in the presence of the Healer

Who has come imperceptibly as the heralding flags are unfurled 

And the dancers dance with dignity and abandon

And we who sing, chant in the resonance 

And we sink as we are into the shelter 

Of the dark cloud of the presence

This is the work of birthing: Freeing captive souls.

Here is the realm of natural grace

Prevailing like light throwing prismatic through rainsky.

The waves subside finally

I move straight to the table

For I will consummate now with bread and wine

Holding the awe; drinking the awe, eating the awe

Shaking in my thin, inflammable skin.

And feeling the safety of the awe

I love you, I whisper with relief. 

I trust you with my life, see?

You know what I am capable of.

All true.  I am.

Now we entreat

With empowered courage

Responding to the audience granted

Following that which escapes us back to its source

Threading through the opening to lay our shattered hearts down

Our hopes and fears, confidences and doubts

I trust you with my life, see?

I am

The glory that we intoned 

And felt and responded to in sobs and moans

Is emphasized now in measure, in teaching, 

In case we didn’t enter the awe

And that is good because some don’t

If their own intrigue is too strong

But for me, I am infused, and holding that, closely

Hidden in the shelter of the pillar

Face in hands

When the matter is settled 

Then it is time to move on; yet many sit still

Savoring

When I finally move to leave,

The intrigues are active again and the interactions

They are still remarkably transparent in all their vulnerability

Awkward here and there as I return to courtesy

Demurring and gathering the awe around me like an invisibility cloak

I slip away from the outer court

And travel on.