Shelter

Shelter              11/23/04   

The time you challenged me, it was with a dangerous dare
Your presence touched my surprise;
How did you manage to apparate, so close?
What I thought was private turned out to be a channel,
And left me uncomfortable with the implications, and your eyes

Disconcerted I was at your readiness to take upon yourself dark danger
With no apparent protection
It made me chilly and ware
And in spite of my awe of you
My response stood up and challenged you back

I will tell you that
Lucifer was the name of one of the Bright Ones
But his name was lost when he repudiated his relationship.
Now they call him by his attribute instead.
And he cannot be trusted but to lie and perform.

And you portrayed him feasting sensuously on a living heart,
Mocking the Life and invoking cold Terror

What I heard was; One apart from the carnal; pure and golden---
Sacrificed to lust
Either way an apt metaphor for the Quest, in which,
Losing oneself in the sea of roles and the drama,
One seeks to represent--some truth
This is the great risk we take upon ourselves,
As we depict before the hungry public
You lie exposed before the whole world, and the behemoth you arouse
Turns.... and feasts upon your heart
This is the price, and it may cost you your name.

I respect your quest.
And I have come to terms with your challenge, friend.
Where love is, there will be no harm
Nor fear of the battlefield and its behemoth
Just a dawning
But this light is still pale in your face
Now I see--
You are tired,
Past awe: Exhaustion cradled by Restlessness,

You know even in sleep, It will lap up whatever drops are left...
That nameless thing sometimes circles my bed, and I awake, too,
Too soon
To find that I am not resting even yet--
But that even in sleep, I am vigilant and anxious at my core--
And must remind myself to rest,
To trust myself to the unseen.
To sink into the awe
To vanish undetected

For now, the behemoth is unaware of me, and I am still hidden
Like a pebble in a sling pouch
While the one who keeps me broods like a thunderhead over the land
He moves like a big dark cloud in my spirit and through my thoughts
Which perhaps once were private, but have now found a pathway into the awe
And springs a rivulet
To you

I can show you shelter
If you can accept my challenge

I will tell you:
The eye of God
Is like a thousand mirrors on the inside of your heart.....
No pretense will protect you
But the heart of God--
His heart, I say,
Is a deep keep,
Where you can sleep
As if dead; unwound of all mortal peril
Your name safe
Your life, hidden.